#204 First 100 Words

For Immediate Release:

Dateline: Philadelphia, PA

http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2024/09/204-first-100-words.html

 

#204 BlogPost          Wednesday 25 September 2024

Posted by Denny Hatch

 

 

"YourFirst 100 Words Are More Important
Thanthe Next Ten Thousand."
                    —Elmer "Sizzle" Wheeler

 

 

Above isthe lede of a “dry test” 8-page direct mail letter that was sent in 1979.  It offered a one-year subscription to a newsletter — InternationalLiving.  The newsletter did not exist.

Itwas the brainstormof fledgling marketing genius, Bill Bonner — a
rail-thin, six-foot-two 30-year-old advertising copywriter — right after he underwent three catastrophic failures that left him $70,000 in debt.

 

Bonner sent this "dry test" letter to a rented list of several thousand homeowners to see ifanyone would read it and respond. His letter — entirely fiction — was 300% profitable on day one ofreturns. Wow!

 

Billimmediately borrowed start-up capital, published the newsletter, and mailedthat very letter for the next 23 years.

 

Today BillBonner’s wee newsletter business — 44 years later — is called The Agora (theagora.com). It’s a mighty conglomerateof 36 global entrepreneurial companies in 15 countries around the world withrevenues of over $1 billion a year! 

 

            Bill Bonner at one of his two French chateaus, Chateau d'Ouzilly,
                down the road from David Ogilvy's Chateau de Toffou.
             
                        

The Power of Those First 100 Words.

 Takea moment to go back and look at wizardry of Bill Bonner’s first hundredwords. They paint a picture of you — “Dear Reader” — waking up in a lush lifestyle enjoyed only by the very, very rich.

 

• In those first 100 words,“you” or “your” is used seven times.

  

• Your maid is bringing you your breakfast in bed while out your window  overlooking the ocean your gardener is busy pruning your lemon, cherry and fig trees and amid the splendor of your gardenias, hibiscus and hollyhocks.

• And what's more, you can easily afford it, Bonner promises.

• Bill'sletter is all about YOU, the reader. Absolutely nothing about Bill.

• Nowhere tobe found: the words “I,” “me,” “my,” “we” or “our.”

 

I inviteyou to download (free) Bill Bonner's legendary letter for
your swipe file. Not only is it the 8-page document that launched his $1 billion a year corporate empire, it's fascinating to read!
What's more, it couldchange how you communicate with strangers. And maybe even change your life andhow you do business!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/16S8lGX0_1DaVg3jbO0EcpfgPrgxFj2Lb/view?usp=sharing

 

Today's Blog Post Was Triggered by This Letter Sent
To Me Last Month from a Colleague Asking my Opinion.

(Quickie Aside:the name and address above have been changed for the sake of privacy; they are fake. I never reveal sources. —DH)

 

• Thisthing is emphatically not eight pages about extraordinary benefitsthat will change your humdrum life into millionaire’s dream world...

 

• Ken Fisher’s letter is just two pages long — allabout Ken Fisher, his book and his company. 

 

• In this paltry two-page personalized lede you'd find “I” is used 5 times; “it“ fourtimes; “we” thrice; and “our” twice.

Fisher’sletter instantly reminded me of freelancer Ed McLean’s blockbuster letter for Newsweekin the 1960s. The lede:

 

Dear Reader,

 

       If the list upon which I found your name isany indication, this is not the first — nor will it be the last — subscription letteryou receive. Quite frankly, your education and income set you apart from thegeneral population and make you a highly rated prospect for everything frommagazines to mutual funds.

 

Itwas an offbeat approach — one that both flattered the reader and, at the sametime, let prospects in on how they came to receive the solicitation. Manypeople wrote in to ask what list they were on. A few felt it was creepy andcomplained.

 

Manymore responded by subscribing to the magazine. It was the unbeatable controlfor many years and was mailed in the tens of millions. 

KenFisher’s Preposterous Premise.

Take another look at Fisher's lede. He is saying his offer is to the “WealthiestAmericans.”  

 

Gosh, that certainly includes JeffBezos (net worth 204.4 billion USD),  WarrenBuffett (net worth 140.9 billion USD) and Bill Gates (net worth 138.6 billionUSD).

 

Can you imagine gazillionires Bezos, Buffet and Gates — gleefullyjumping at the opportunity to acquire ("free to you") Ken Fisher’s 99 Retirement Tips?Plus his BONUS guide to Maximize Your Social Security?

 

Preposterous!

 

Takeaways to Consider:

Seven Proven Tips for Writers.

•“Short words! Short sentences!” Short paragraphs!”
—Andrew J. Byrne

 

•“Tests have shown that a sentence of eight words is very easy to read; of 11words, easy; of 14 words, fairly easy; of 17 words, standard; of 21 words,fairly difficult; of 25 words, difficult; of 29 or more words, very difficult;so this sentence with 54 words, counting numbers, is ranked impossible.”
—Virginia-Pilot

 

•The 7 Key Copy Drivers — emotional hot buttons that make people act:
Fear – Greed – Guilt – Anger –Exclusivity – Salvation – Flattery
—Axel Andersson. Bob Hacker

 

•“If your copy isn’t dripping with one or more of these copy drivers, tear it upand start over.”
—Bob Hacker

 

•The 13 most powerful and evocative words in the English language are:
 You -  Save - Money- Guarantee - Love – Results -?Proven–
 Safety - Easy – New - Health -Discovery – Free
—Goodman Ace

 

• "Avoid gray walls of type."
—David Ogilvy

•“Type smaller than 9-point is difficult for most people to read.”  
 —David Ogilvy

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source http://www.expertclick.com/NewsRelease/204-First-100-Words,2024306860.aspx